The Close Call

 

            The airplane began to plummet toward the ocean. Shrieks sounded throughout the cabin. The flight attendants were pretending to stay calm, struggling to maintain their balance and stopping to assist frantic passengers as they scrambled to get to their seats. Instructions were blaring over the intercom, but no one was listening.

             I quivered in my window seat, clutching the oxygen mask and telling myself to breathe normally. All I saw was blue. Treacherous blue that got darker and darker the closer we got to it.

            My head felt like it was about to explode from the pressure in my ears. Bruce wrapped his strong fingers around mine.

            At any other time, I would have thought it romantic. I had been waiting for Bruce to notice me for months! This was a dream come true. Except in my dream, we weren’t about to die.

            I looked up at him and for one strange moment, we were lost in each other’s eyes. I couldn’t understand the absence of fear in his steady gray gaze. Tears filled mine.

           “Aren’t you afraid of dying?” He somehow heard me over the commotion.

           “No.”

           “But why?” I was angry.

           “You know why.”

           The crash was mere seconds away and I braced myself for the impact-- but it never came.

           Bruce’s hand was still firmly clasping mine. I felt my body settle back into my seat. I was no longer dangling forward, held in place only by my seat belt. Throughout the cabin, I heard sighs of relief. Several sobs broke out. Someone gave a loud, succinct, clap. Soon, everyone was clapping.

           “Thank you, Jesus.” I heard Bruce’s heartfelt whisper as he released my hand to join the crowd.

           I didn’t know what shocked me more. The fact that we hadn’t crashed, or how Bruce thought Jesus had a part in this. Jesus hadn’t conducted the water landing – the pilots had!

            The next few hours rushed by with me in a trancelike state. Help was summoned. We were hustled out of the cabin onto rafts where we sat and watched the airplane sink. Everyone was transported and checked into an expensive hotel. Compliments of the airline, they told us.

            They went over the procedures and how they would work at getting us on the earliest flights available to our final destination.

            I wasn’t listening. I didn’t even know what country we were in. I left it to Bruce to handle the paperwork and signed where he told me to.

            After a hot shower, I crawled into bed. Adrenaline was still coursing through my veins and I tried to stop the trembling by wrapping myself tighter into my lush, beige, comforter cocoon.

            The phone rang. I groaned and managed to pull my arm out of the covers to answer it.

            “Hungry?” Bruce sounded way too collected.

            “Are you serious?” I garbled. “The last thing on my mind is food.”

           “Oh.” He paused. “How about a walk?  It’s a beautiful night!”

             I propped myself up with my elbow. “Bruce.”

           “What?”

           “Did it occur to you that we just survived a plane crash?”

            Momentary silence. “But we didn’t crash.”

            I didn’t know what to think. How could a man fascinate and infuriate me so much at the same time?

            “So what do you say we get outside and breathe some fresh air? I think it would do you good.”

            I still didn’t respond.

            “On our way in I saw some little shops we could visit. Maybe we could grab some dinner while we’re out. I’m hungry.”

            I grunted and let my face get swallowed up by a pillow.

            “Carla. Come on. Staying wrapped up in bed is not gonna make you feel better.”

            How did he know I was wrapped up in bed?

            “Besides,” he had his negotiating voice on – one of the things that made him such a wonderful business partner – I just didn’t like it when he used it on me, “it’s not every day that you find yourself stranded in Greece.”

            That caught my attention. “Wait, what?”

            “What what?”

            “Where did you say we are again?”

            “Just outside of Chania, Crete. You knew that.”

            “I… forgot. Or it didn’t register.” I rubbed my throbbing temples. I’m in Greece! “Are we really?” 

            Bruce laughed. That husky chuckle that sent me reeling on most occasions now sent a shiver down my spine. “Yes we are. Does that mean you’ll come?”

            I didn’t want to get out from the covers, but the thought of an evening stroll down the cobblestones of an ancient city with the subject of my infatuation was too much to pass up.

            “Sure. Give me about ten-ish minutes.”

            “Sounds good to me.” I could hear his satisfied smile. “See ya.”

            With renewed enthusiasm, I untangled myself from the bedspreads and threw on a white, loose flowing low-cut blouse, slipped on a skirt, then stepped into my three inch pumps. A quick flick of the wrist told me I had another six minutes. I grabbed my makeup from my overnight bag and almost tripped over my own foot on my way to the bathroom.

Jamming the hairdryer into the plug, I bent over double and let the hot air blast through my still damp, shoulder length blonde hair. Once that was done, I quickly ran my mascara wand over my lashes, sprayed on some perfume, and with a swipe of lip gloss, smiled in satisfaction at my reflection.

Bruce was waiting in the hallway. “You sure you’re not hungry?” His lopsided grin had more effect on me than I liked. He had changed out of his business suit into a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt. I felt like an overdressed fool.

            “Not quite yet. But who knows. That might change.” I chanced a flirtatious smile.

            “Thanks for the warning.” That chuckle again.

My pulse raced.

Like a perfect gentleman, he gestured for me to walk ahead of him.

            I felt giddy with excitement, like a college freshman on my first date all over again. A twinge of guilt jabbed at my conscience but I pushed it aside. As we stepped through the hotel’s huge double doors, I closed my eyes and drew in a deep breath of the warm sea breeze.

From where we stood at the top of the hill, we could see most of the city and the coastline. The buildings and streetlamps produced a warm, yellow glow that settled over the land, contrasting with the blackness that enveloped the ocean which was scarcely glittered by scattered ships sitting on the dark water.

            “Should I say I told you so?” Bruce bumped my arm with his elbow, his hands leisurely shoved deep into his pockets.

            I smiled. “You were right.” 

We walked along the sidewalk down the hill in silence for some moments. Bruce seemed to be his normal, laidback self. I tried to act likewise, but in my mind I was torturing myself, wondering what was going through his mind. Did he at least think I was pretty?   

            “So did you contact your family?” His question jolted me out of my reverie.

            My family! How could I have forgotten? “Um. Actually.” A nervous little laugh escaped my lips. “No, I’ll call them later tonight. They weren’t expecting me for a couple more days anyway.”

            Bruce gave me a strange look, opened his mouth to say something, then shut it again. After several awkward minutes, he broke the silence with, “Well, my mom cried for a good ten minutes when I spoke to her.”

            “Oh did she?”  I feigned interest. This was not going well.

            “Yea, she kept going on and on about what could have happened.” He smiled fondly.

            “It’s not every day that your son tells you he survived a plane crash.” I was struggling to keep up with the conversation. I wished he would make a move. Put his arm around my shoulder – or my waist. I faked a shiver and rubbed my hands up and down my bare arms. The guy remained oblivious.

            “Yea,” He had a faraway look, “and Allison just couldn’t stop praising the Lord.”

            I stopped dead in my tracks. So that was it. Allison. No wonder he was so distracted. Bruce talked about her every now and then. I knew she was a romantic interest, but that didn’t stop me from hoping he would forget about her. So much for thinking this trip had brought us so much closer!

            Bruce hadn’t even noticed that I was no longer walking next to him. Fuming, I started after him, catching up just as he stopped to look in a shop window.

            “Hey, take a look at this.” He pointed at a ring. Simple, yet exquisite, a single amethyst set in a white gold band.               “What do you think of it?”

            My breath caught. Maybe I overreacted. Maybe he didn’t really care about Allison after all. What if I said I liked it?  Would he get it for me? It could be our very own memento – a souvenir that would always remind us of the magical time we spent together in an exotic land after conquering death together. It was the perfect love story!

            “I – I love it.” I stammered. “It’s beautiful.” I swallowed, then smiled up at him, hoping that my wide blue eyes revealed my admiration for him.

            Instead, he barely looked at me. Cocking his head and still staring at the ring, his lips curled upward as he nodded. “I think she’ll like it.”

            She? It’s for her! Jealousy flooded me all over again, this time surging through my veins with vengeance. I struggled to maintain my composure. “You mean Allison?” I kept my voice soft. Delicate.

           “Yea, Allison.” The way he said her name made me want to get sick right there on the pavement.

            You are such an idiot! The voice in my head mocked me. I had to take control of the situation. I had to get that woman out of his head.

           “Bruce,” I slipped my hand through the crook of his elbow and gently turned him to face me. “Just forget about her for now, won’t you?”

            He frowned slightly. “Forget her?”

           “Well yeah.” I gave him a coy smile, my fingers slowly creeping up his arm. “Why don’t you just enjoy tonight?  You and me, on an isle of Greece. We could grab a quick bite and satisfy that stomach of yours, then go back to the hotel…” I let my voice drift and allowed my eyes to do the rest of the talking. My wandering fingers settled on his chest. I could feel his heart pounding. My own sped up.

           “Carla.” He swallowed, removed my hand and stepped back, grasping my shoulders at arm’s length. “You’re not acting like yourself. What’s going on?” 

           I refused to be discouraged. “I am acting myself. This is me. The real me.” I bit my lip and gazed up at him with what I had been told were beguiling eyes.

           Bruce shifted uncomfortably. His usually self-confident stance was now one of uncertainty. I thought he looked adorable.

           I loved the feel of his strong fingers holding me and took it as an invitation to lightly put my hands over them.                  “Come on, Bruce. Surely you know. I’ve wanted you for the longest time.”

          His eyes narrowed. “You’re a married woman, Carla.”

          I drew a sharp breath. I did not need to be reminded. “I don’t love Ryan anymore,” I said stiffly.

          “You don’t love your husband anymore?”

          “No.” I toyed with his fingers.

           He released me abruptly and took another step back. Rubbing the back of his neck, he shook his head. “Why not?”

           I shrugged. “Because I met you.”

           His nostrils flared. “This can’t be true.”

           “You don’t believe me?” I sounded hurt. Vulnerable.

           “Oh I believe you. You couldn’t be clearer. It’s everything else that does not make sense!” It was the first time I heard him raise his voice.

           “What doesn’t make sense?”

           “You’re my business partner! All this while, I thought we were extremely clear about that. Did I ever lead you on?”

           “Well no, but I hoped.”

           “You hoped?” He was incredulous.

           “I thought that this trip to Dubai would change things between us. And I truly thought it did. On the plane… asking me to come on a walk with you –” My words sounded lame to my own ears.

           “That made you think that I was interested in you?”

           Tears filled my eyes.

           “Oh please. Don’t cry.” He ran his hands over his face.

           “I could make you so happy.”

           “You have a husband who loves you and kids who think the world of you.”

           “They don’t make me happy. They haven’t for a long time. But you will.” I gave him a pleading look.

           “Carla, I love Allison.”

           “No you don’t!”

           “Yes, I do.” He spoke slowly. Emphatically.

           “I felt you respond to me.” My voice was breathy.

            He gave a short laugh. “I’m no saint, Carla. I’m a man, and you are… very womanly.”

            I took that as an encouragement and threw myself at him, wrapping my arms tightly around his waist. I was losing control of myself and I knew it, but at that moment, I didn’t care. “You want me.” I pressed my cheek against his hard chest. Longing rose within me. “You know you want me.”

            I felt his fingers clamp around my shoulders again, pulling me away, but I clung on, digging my fingers into his shirt.

           “Carla.” He sighed, and when I refused to let go, gave up and wrapped his arms around me. A hug. Not one of passion or desire, but one of compassion. The kind of love he was always talking about. The one he said came from his Jesus. The same Jesus who had taken my husband and children from me.

            I felt the fire go out of me and I crumbled. Even as I sobbed into his chest, my tears forming big, dark splotches on his gray sweatshirt, I knew that I had done nothing but make a fool of myself. Anger and resentment filled me. Then disappointment and shame. Until finally, spent and embarrassed, I pulled away. I couldn’t even look at him.

            Hiding my face in my hands, I left him standing on the sidewalk and ran back up the hill, all the way back to my hotel room. Climbing into bed, I cried for a good hour. Rejection was not something I handled very well. I felt alone. I felt forsaken.

            I called my husband.

            The news about the near plane crash shook him up, but like Bruce, like Allison, he thanked God. Bitterness set in. Ryan promised to meet me at the airport. I hung up.

            The next day was miserable. I stayed in my room until it was time to leave for the airport. Room service brought me food. It was probably Bruce who sent them. I barely touched it.

            The journey back to LA was the longest 20 hours of my life. Bruce and I sat next to each other, not saying a word.             We got our bags and cleared customs. I called Ryan. He said he had just pulled into the parking lot.

            Bruce touched my elbow.

            I looked at him square in the face for the first time since our encounter.

            “I never meant to hurt you.” His deep voice was full of sincerity.

            “I know.” I whispered. “I’m sorry for the way I acted.”

             He smiled. “I won’t hold it against you. You should know though, that I’ll be handing in my resignation tomorrow.”

             My eyebrows rose. “I should be the one doing that.”

            “No, I’ve actually been thinking about it for some time. Allison lives about 2 hours away. I’ve already been offered several job positions there.”

            “I see.”

            “I’m gonna ask her to marry me, Carla.”

             I gulped and managed a smile. “I’m glad for you.” I fidgeted uneasily. “Did you get the ring?”

             He beamed. “I did.”

            “Well,” I forced another smile. “Good luck. And congratulations in advance.” 

            “Thank you.” He held out his hand. “It’s been great working with you.”

             I nodded and shook the proffered hand. “Likewise.”

            He took a step back. “I’ll be praying for you. And I,” he wavered slightly, “encourage you to work things out with your husband.”

             I nodded again. “Thanks.”

            “Carla!” I heard Ryan’s voice.

            “Mommy, mommy!” He had brought the little ones with him.

              My heart squeezed in my chest as I watched my family run towards me. I had been missing out on so much; had been so caught up with myself. Dropping to my knees, I gathered my two girls close and showered them with kisses, realizing then how precious they were to me. They giggled and squirmed, kissed me back and tumbled over each other.

              Ryan stood by, taking in the scene, until I stood up. Tentatively pulling me into a close embrace, he hesitated before tenderly pressing his lips to my own. “I’m so glad you’re safe, sweetheart.”

              I hugged him back, breathing in his familiar scent, and felt him relax. It had been so long since we had held each other. Ever since he “gave his life to Christ,” I had distanced myself— stubbornly fighting his efforts to bring me to church with him.

              As I rested my chin on my husband’s shoulder, I saw across the room, a tall brunette fall into Bruce’s open arms. Watching them walk away hand in hand, I felt a strange twist in my gut. Wounded as I was, I wished them all the best.